Is Valentine’s Day The End Of Cuffing Season?
How to Deal with Seasonal Relationships and the Hallmark Holiday.
The ever-drumming word is back to haunt us again. Cuffing. Except for this time, it comes attached to a checkered flag. Four months of seasonal relationships are near a close as Valentine’s Day fast approaches. Unbeknown to me until a couple of weeks ago, Valentine’s Day marks the last obstacle seasonal couples face. As we edge closer to Spring, we see if our cuddle buddies will grow with us into the next phase.
Like Valentine’s needed any more pressure, the question of vulnerability and openness come into play as new relationships decipher their feelings for each other. Are we or aren’t we a Valentine’s couple? Or better asked… are we interested in putting the effort into this blooming relationship we seeded in the winter?
The intensity of wondering if your relationship is going to make it past Valentine’s Day only adds to the general distaste for the Hallmark holiday. Though some assume only singles turn their nose up to the red hearts, your relationship status doesn’t automatically determine one’s feelings towards the day. Single, dating, or in a serious relationship, one can love or hate Valentine’s Day all the same. But without staying on how Valentine’s Day is simply about love, though it is, our time may be better spent thinking about what we want in our dating lives.
Valentine’s Day is a vulnerable day for everyone.
If you’re single, you spend the day loving yourself, fighting those sneaky thoughts of loneliness. If you’re in a new relationship, you stress rather or not to celebrate it with your partner, then wonder if it means anything if you don’t. For the vetted couples, you just wonder if you can be bothered or not to buy the CVS chocolates…
Like its cringy movie cousins, this Hallmark love-drunk holiday puts us in our feelings against our own will. We’re forced to come to terms with the hands dealt in front of us. To stay cuffed or decuff. To stay single or be open to new connections. Valentine’s day is a day for decisions. Some get engaged, while others open dating apps for the first time in three months. One is less expensive than the latter… though dating app subscriptions are now denting our credit card statements.
The point is Valentine’s Day makes us think.
Think about our present and our future. And inadvertently inspires action toward the answers to the unknown. My proposal for this year’s love holiday, along with celebrating all the love we have in our lives, is to think about what will bring us happiness in our own hearts. Visualize the next few months of our lives and create a loose course of action to achieve it. When Valentine’s brings thoughts of stress, sadness, or confusion, we can switch the narrative of the holiday to focus on how to move forward with authenticity. Where are we now and where do we want to go in our dating lives?
As the infamous day approaches, shift your view inwards. Listen to your needs and follow suit. Make Valentine’s Day plans based on your vulnerability with yourself. Stay in, hang out with your friends, go to a love-filled dinner with your partner, spend it away from your partner, use it swiping through Hinge, or go see a movie with your Mum. Simply follow what your gut is telling you. It’s easier said than done, but turning a day that feels negative into something positive can have lasting effects. Sadly, we can’t avoid Valentine’s Day and why would we want to?
It’s essentially the day we all see our dating life for what it is.
To stay cuff or decuff. To stay single or start dating again. Valentine’s Day knows. Stay present, and listen to yourself.
Single? Click here for inspiration. Dating? Follow this link for tips for the upcoming day…
